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COOKIES & PRIVACY POLICY

DIVA Horoscopes

Aries (21 Mar-19 Apr)

Come out for one, they said, it'll be fun, they said. Five pints and a regrettable number of shots later and you're feeling a little worse for wear, Aries. Stumbling through deserted streets on a school night might seem like fun at the time, but your 6am wake up call for work will seem anything but. Maybe leave the mid-week partying for others. Curl up in your jim-jams with a cup of cocoa instead. 

 

 

 

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Taurus (20 Apr-20 May)

Alright Taurus, get down from your high horse. Yes, it seems that you were right; but gloating and stating 'I told you so' at every opportunity is becoming a bit too much. Some people are eagerly awaiting the opportunity to wipe that smug look off of your face - now I'm not one to condone violence - but quite frankly, I wouldn't blame them. Let it go, you've had your fun. 

 

 

 

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Gemini (21 May-21 Jun)

Love life on the rocks, Gemini? No, that's not a new fandangled cocktail - stop avoiding the subject. If you want your relationship to work, you have to put some effort in. Treat your lady like a lady, take her out for dinner, maybe take her for some real cocktails? Just treat her right, otherwise someone else will. It doesn't take much to woo your woman, so just give it a go eh? 

 

 

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Cancer (22 Jun-22 Jul)

Being a social butterfly is wonderful, Cancer, but sometimes you can overdo it. Quiz night on a Tuesday, Karaoke Wednesdays, darts on a Thursday and finding an excuse for a piss up any other day of the week - see the pattern? The pub staff know you by name and know what you drink, but that's not necessarily a good thing. Maybe have a night in in front of the telly? Give yourself some time to recoup.   

 

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Leo (23 Jul-22 Aug)

Grabbing the bull by the horns seems to be working for you, Leo! You're no stranger to doing things on a whim, but it's only in recent times that it's paying off. Don't get negative though - be prepared for things screwing up, but don't base your decisions on that happening. Who's to say that things are going to go wrong eh? Just live your life day to day and enjoy the good things coming your way! 

 

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Virgo (23 Aug-22 Sep)

Being given the cold shoulder Virgo? It seems that you've upset someone but can't for the life of you figure out why... Instead of ignoring them and brushing it under the carpet why not deal with it head on? Sure, it's scary fronting up to someone when they've got a problem with you, hit surely it'd be better to get to the bottom of things? Even if they're being ridiculous, it'll be a weight off your mind won't it?

 

 

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Libra (23 Sep-23 Oct)

There's a difference between vanity and having low self-esteem, Libra. If you're resisting the urge to wink at yourself in the mirror: vanity. If you're trying to hide behind your fringe: low self-esteem. The best thing to do is to find a happy medium - don't be too cocky, but hold your head high. I know, sounds slightly unobtainable right? Just avoid mirrors all together, then you'll have no opportunity to preen eh! 

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Scorpio (24 Oct-21 Nov)

Keep your eyes to yourself please, Scorpio. So you're single, but that doesn't give you a free pass to check out every lady that comes your way. You're beginning to make the coffee barista uncomfortable, the lady at the petrol station, and for goodness sake - ordering a pizza just to see the delivery woman? At least tip her if she's going to have to endure your ogling! Calm those hormones down! 

 

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Sagittarius (22 Nov-21 Dec)

Friends won't wait for you forever, Sagittarius. While you're busy dithering around and deciding what you want to do with your life, they're all out making connections and having fun. Sure, everyone's entitled to browse the internet, or give their thumbs a work out on a games console... But when it becomes a daily occurrence, there's something wrong. Get out there! 

 

 

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Capricorn (22 Dec-19 Jan)

Aww have you got the sniffles, Capicorn? Not feeling your best? Don't let that stop you. Of course you're allowed to relax if you feel like you're at deaths door, but if it's just a snuffly nose, then you're more than capable of doing things! You're better half doesn't mind getting you a blanket, tea, pills, cuddles... But don't milk it eh? Shoe on other foot you'd get a bit pissed off with it in the end wouldn't you?

 

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Aquarius (20 Jan-18 Feb)

Don't roll your eyes, Aquarius, they're just trying to pay you a compliment. No-one takes compliments well, but you could at least be graceful about it rather than retreating into your shell. Smile sweetly and, even if it's through gritted teeth, squeeze out a thank you. It's basic manners - and you wouldn't want someone to think you're ugly on the inside would you? 

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Pisces (19 Feb-20 Mar)

Baby steps can sometimes take a little longer than expected, Pisces, but your lovely lady seems to be getting there right? Give her a chance to take count of her thoughts, rationalise them, then work on them. She needs to take it slowly and, if you're honest, so do you. Don't worry though, we all get there in the end... Your baby steps took a while before they turned into leaps after all... Give it some time.  

 

 

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